I might be one of the most extra people when it comes to my birthday. If I told you what I’ve done for myself this month, you’d think I’m balling here. In reality I have to starve myself for the first 6 months of the year just so that I save enough money to allow me to be extra for one month then go back to being broke. There you have it guys, now you know why I’m 20 years and weighing 20kgs.
Hello beautiful people. Yes it was my birthday this weekend. To be honest, the coolest people are born in July. I’m not cool so I really don’t understand why I was born in July, but oh well, I can’t argue with God. Anyway, let’s get straight to the point, here’s 7 things I think 20s are for.
- 20s are for discovering yourself.
We live in a world where it’s so easy to be defined by what the world thinks of you. But away from all the noise, who are you really? Discovering who you are is a process, a lifetime process. So is everything I’ll discuss in this blog post. I don’t mean that because it’s what 20s are for, when you clock 30 you stop discovering yourself, you suddenly have amnesia and can’t remember who you are. lol. Neither do I mean that at 19 you have no idea who you are. No, it’s a never ending journey. However, it has to start somewhere right. If you’re already on this journey, kudos, but if you haven’t began, it’s never too late. I feel like once you understand who you are, it even becomes easier to relate with people. Discovering yourself is the simplest and also the most difficult task. Simple because you answer questions like what are your likes, dislikes, limits, opinions on things, talents, passions, hobbies, your personality etc. Somehow difficult because you have to start understanding your purpose, and start dealing with things in you that may not be the prettiest. I think the one aspect of myself I’m most glad I found out was my personality type, or temperament if you want. I’m Melancholic and Sanguine, two completely opposite temperaments. For the longest time before I got to learn that, I thought I had a problem, because one day I’d be introverted and not want to talk to anyone, then the next I’d be extroverted and all over the place talking to everyone. Now I know why, and I began learning how to balance. If you’ve never done one of those temperament tests or you don’t even know what I’m talking about, Google is your best friend. But If you’re too lazy and would rather read a post concerning that, hit me up.
- 20s are for loving yourself.
How do you give what you don’t have? How do you learn to accept someone’s faults and love them despite their faults if you can’t do the same for yourself? Oh my, I could go on and on forever about self-love because it is so broad and so dear to my heart. There are so many of us out here seeking love from external sources, places, people, things, and don’t really understand the concept of self-love, I used to be one of those people but I’ve been learning. Once you start practising self-love, believe that you are enough and that God loves you, you’ll see life in a completely different light and you won’t be defined by the love humans are able to give. Learn to love yourself and enjoy your own company. Take yourself for dinner or lunch, go for a photoshoot on your own as I did for my birthday (I’m so extra), switch off your phone for 24hours or more and just chill by yourself, buy yourself a bouquet of flowers, go for salsa night, go for a hike or a nature walk, heck even go for a trip by yourself. If you do these things, it’s doesn’t mean you’re lonely or alone, It doesn’t even matter if people think you are. Hunny, you are building an empire by investing in yourself.
“Until you get comfortable with being alone, you will never know if you’re choosing someone for love or loneliness.” -Mandy Hale.
- 20s are for chasing your dreams.
What would you say you did with those dreams you have and with the talents you were given. I believe by the time you die, you have to die empty. You need to have used your gifts and talents and chased your dreams so much that when you take the last breath, there’s nothing more you can give the world. If you know me, you know I do the most I can when it comes to my dreams. I mean, this blog in itself is me trying to chase one of my dreams. To be honest, sometimes I do so much that I get overwhelmed, but it’s because I know I won’t be young forever, and I need to start now. Funny story, so I act yeah, if you follow me on Instagram or snap, you probably know that. I went for an audition some time back, for a theater musical. Please note, that I can not sing to save my life, but I was like hey why not. Luckily there were roles that didn’t require singing, so I decided those are the ones I’ll audition for. Ah, so I get in front of the guys auditioning us, then they tell me to sing. Lord have mercy. Most terrifying experience of my life. Did I sing? Oh yes hunny, I did, I tried to sing. TRIED being the key word and of course you can guess it, that was the end of that. Lol. Point is, stop sitting on your talents and your dreams, chase them.
- 20s are for celebrating life.
Who remembers YOLO? For a while, that was the most overused and misused phrase. Like ‘hey let’s jump over this cliff’.. ‘YOLO lesssgoooo’… ‘Hey let’s put our heads inside the crocodile’s mouth’… ‘YOLO’.. ‘Hey let’s do this thing called school’.. ‘YOLO Let’s do it’ Anyway you get the point. Yes you have only one life to live, but it’s not that you live it recklessly, but that you enjoy what life has to offer. Do you realize you’re only young once, and a few years from now you won’t be able to do some things because you’ll be too busy. Honestly, sometimes we worry ourselves so much about so many things. How about you stop for a second and realize, it’s not that serious. For me twenties is where I get to actually celebrate being alive, go for concerts, picnics, roadtrips, sleep for 24 hours straight, bungee jumping, travel and see the world (I’m currently broke so the furthest I can go for now is Rongai). A few years from now we’ll have actual adulting problems, like rent, fees, food etc, why don’t we just enjoy the life we have now instead of wanting so hard to grow up?
- 20s are for picking up new skills.
Twenties are for doing things you’ve always wanted to do and gaining skills and hobbies that interest you. Adulting is hard guys, I’m not there yet, but it’s evident. It would be really hard to learn something new while adulting. I remember that saying for you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. That applies here. (I just compared you to a dog lol). In your 20s, take up a new hobbie, learn an instrument, do something different. Last year I did cooking classes, not ugali and sijui mokimo, nah fam, it was different cuisines from all around the world. I also started doing salsa classes a month ago and I plan on starting gardening and knitting really soon, just because I’m extra and want to do everything. Hey, these are the years to start doing them so why not.
- 20s are for building intimate friendships.
Friendship is one of the most precious relationships to me. Boyfriends and girlfriends, come and go, but friendship can last a lifetime. As humans we like ‘settling’.. even when friendships are not working, we like to just let it be and accept the shallowness. That’s why I like that I’m a mutant ninja turtle, because we don’t settle for shallow. Seriously though, forget the ‘hi, how are you, how is life, good’ kind of friendship. How about we try make our friendships more intentional and not just routine? If you can’t open up and be honest to the people you call your ‘closest’ friends now, when life gets serious and you start adulting, suddenly you’ll get to that intimacy? Nah, fam. I’m not saying you force issues. I mean, not everyone will be worthy of getting to know everything happening in your life, all I’m saying is let your closest friendships have meaning. Aside from all the fun and beautiful memories that come with friendship, let’s start getting personal with each other, be all up in each other’s faces with deep and intimate conversations. How about we be open and honest about how we are to our closest friends? How about we stop talking bad about our closest friends or about anyone really? How about we stop canceling plans, and start replying texts (biggest victim there). How about we start chamas, cause there’s nothing as intimate as trusting people with your money. Lol.
- 20s are for living.
What if God forbid you died tomorrow? Would you have lived a happy life or will you have been so overwhelmed by anger, heartbreak, disappointment or hardships that you actually forgot that life was meant for living. We all go through hard times, we all get heartbroken at some point, we all get disappointed and angered, but we can’t live in that same place forever. Life has so much to offer if we only stop, breathe in and see it for all its color. I believe that pain, anger, frustration, fear, etc, should be FELT. If someone hurts you today, cry, scream, whatever you want, but don’t stay there. Let go of those who hurt you, forgive them, forgive yourself for mistakes you’ve made and people you’ve hurt, stop obsessing over things, opportunities or people you’ve lost. You’re young once, you live once. Stop existing and actually start living.
Thank you for reading. Till next time. Chaoooo.
Grow and Glow ✨